New Year's Resolution Is (Not) Bullshit

New year's resolution is not bullshit if you dream of doing something realistic.

So, instead of “I wanna make change to the world” or “I want to be a millionaire”, just make a realistic new year's resolution for 2017.

For example, me. After having a long time to think, I finally decided my new year's resolution for 2017. It’s something simple yet realistic enough to achieve.

“To be more independent.”

Sounds cheesy and not important? Not at all for me.

Because I’m a hella dependent person. I feel so so so insecure to be all by myself. It’s as if I will always need a friend to accompany me. For example, I always feel the need to call at least one of my friend every single night. This takes to another level when I even feel the need to watch a movie together with my friends through skype. (Yeah, skype can do that. It’s called the sharing screen fiture. Skype is daboom, guys.)

And when my friends don't reply my text for a day, I get so worried by the fact that I might do something wrong to them. Or when my friend update their instagram instead of replying to my message, I always overthink. But really, they might just be busy or doesn't feel like chatting. Yes, I am this dependent to others. And yes, I know exactly that I need to change this attitude of mine.

To make my resolution a realistic one, I need to have plans to fulfill it.

1.    I have to take myself out on a date.

It’s not at all shameful to go to the mall by yourself. It’s not at all shameful to eat inside a café by yourself. It’s called ‘me time’.

I have to learn that being alone is not a bad thing, and that it’s sometimes even necessary to just be all by yourself.

2.    Distract myself from trying to call my friends.

I have to find distraction that stop myself from calling others. Such as, watching dramas, engulf myself with a lot of works, talking to my family, etc.

And so far, it’s working well.

3.    Slowly change my mindset.

To love myself and not to feel insecure by being alone.

Those are all concrete steps that I can think of to be more independent in 2017. I realized that I can’t forever be dependent to others. The only person that I can count on by the end of the day is just myself.

How about you? What is your new year's resolution for 2017?

Go make a realistic one and create concrete steps to achieve it!

And also do not forget to execute it, because that’s what matters most. Wishing you a life-changing year ahead, peeps!

-JElim

Pengalaman Acara Live In

Okay, this post is another excuse for me to slack off instead of doing my tasks.

                Kali ini, aku ingin curcol tentang pengalaman Live In-ku selama seminggu di desa Pait Lor, Malang. Yang awalnya kukira bakal jadi pengalaman terburukku sepanjang masa since hanya boleh bawa 4 baju dan 4 celana untuk seminggu, (itupun celanaku disita 1 biji karena melanggar peraturan, njir), lalu di sana tidak ada signal sekali. Like literally, signalnya zonk total. Jangankan untuk internetan, untuk kirim sms pun susah!

                Aku ingat sempat muter-muter di jalan, naik kursi, naik ranjang, hanya demi mencari segaris signal untuk telepon orang tua. Padahal awalnya, kupikir kegiatan cari signal yang seperti itu sangat berlebihan dan hanya bisa ditemui di sinetron.

                Tujuan utamaku ikut Live In pun tidak terpenuhi. Awalnya, aku ingin ikut Live In supaya menjauh dari drama kehidupan. Ternyata, kehidupan desa lebih peeeeeeenuh drama! Kalo Ibu Mawar dan Ibu Melati ketemu, mereka ngomongin Ibu Kamboja. Kalo Ibu Melati dan Ibu Kamboja ketemu, mereka ngomongin Ibu Mawar. Begitu terus sampai mampus. Kalau kata orang muka dua, Ibu-ibu di desa ini mukanya ada 5. Aku pun sempat jadi obrolan orang sekampung karena mukaku yang sinis dan selalu keliatan nantang ini. Like, plis, dari lahir juga mukaku begini???

                Kenyataannya, Live In jadi pengalaman yang I’m sure that I will remember at least for a long long time ahead, karena:

1.    Aku hoki. Buanget. Serumah dihuni oleh 2 mahasiswa. Kebetulan, teman sekamarku itu cuocok to the max denganku (sama-sama hobi tidur siang, sama-sama jarang mandi, sama-sama tidur subuh, sama-sama sering makan), pokoknya cucok lah! (hai, Diah! Kalo kamu baca ini, I miss you so much really!)

2.    Pemilik dari rumah yang aku tinggali adalah Ibunya Pak Lurah. Istilahnya, lebih berada dari kebanyakan warga desa lainnya. Jadi aku tetap makan enak dan tidur enak walau di desa. Asek woy. Tapi tetep bantu-bantu Ibunya untuk metik tomat di sawah dan jemur padi, kok.

3.    Karena nggak ada signal at all di desa, hiburanku satu-satunya hanyalah main bersama teman-teman.

Literally, the best time saat Live In adalah saat malam hari ini. Dimana kita diam-diam berkumpul di satu rumah untuk curcol bahas soal politik, gosip, horror, sampe main werewolf, capsa, apapun hingga jam 12 subuh.

Sampai hari terakhir acara Live In pun, hal yang paling susah untuk dilakukan adalah berpisah dengan teman-teman senasib ini.

Kangen kalian semua loh. Kangen our endless nights diam-diam main kartu sampai mampus. Kangen obrolan geje dan guyonan receh.

Kangen Wuwu yang kalo main ceblek nyamuk selalu kalah.

Titus yang koleksi cincin akiknya sampai 400 biji dan hobinya sepik-in SEMUA cewek.

Mbak Della yang selalu diintipin Titus waktu mandi.

Diah yang jerawatnya dikira orang-orang mirip tindikan.

Steven yang diem banget sampe dikira warga desa penyakitan.

Nella yang kalo makan dari matahari terbit sampai terbenam juga belom selesai-selesai.

Vania yang harmonis sekali dengan Ibu angkatnya.

Nggak kangen Ghea sama Stef sih, soalnya tiap hari tetep ketemu di kampus juga(?)

But anyway, let’s keep in touch, okay?

I know that we can’t always meet up, but a mere group chat will suffice, right?

So, please, please, tetep rame-rame selalu di group. Titus jangan pernah berhenti sepikin semua cewe. Cewe-cewenya juga ayo sepikin Titus balik. Steven tolong hiduplah di group. Bersyukur banget ikut Live In karena somehow and by chance bisa ketemu makhluk-makhluk ajaib kayak kalian semua. Pokoknya love you guys!

Heck, I even dedicated a post in my blog just for you.

Does family really matter?

sumber:http://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/s480x480/e35/11899444_164987020508166_956900359_n.jpg?ig_cache_key=MTA4MjA3ODQ5MzI5ODMxODI0NQ%3D%3D.2

I’m supposed to edit 2 articles, pack for ‘live in’ program that I will attend for a week from tomorrow, and do my internship’s tasks. Instead, I’m writing this damn article.

You can call it a way of proscatinating; I call this my way to survive from Life, who is now trying to fuck me.

Let me get to my point.

Yesterday, I went to my friend’s house to celebrate the first day of 2017 together. At his house, there are him, his mom, his dad, his lil bro, and 2 cousins.

What amazed me was how warm it was to be in his house. I’m not living there and the warmness strucked me hard. There was this one scene that I remembered exactly in my mind.

For the sake of this story, let’s call his mom Shizuka and his dad Pikachu. (hence the photo)

Shizuka was cooking something in the kitchen when Pikachu came in to watch his wife cooked.

Then Shizuka joked, “Wah, mau pesen apa nih, Pak?”

What surprised me, is that Pikachu laughed hard because of the joke. And I swear, with the name of deities or watever it actually is, that I saw Pikachu looked LOVINGLY at Sizhuka.

Do you know the look that Prince Charming give to Cinderella while dancing? Or in the Sinetron while the main male lead watch the girl from afar?

I literally saw ‘that look’ LIVE.

And then I asked my friend and I found out that Pikachu and Shizuka have been married for over 20 years.

Here is the thing, I have a friend that has been together with me for 9 years. And if she joked to me while cooking, “Wah, mau pesen apa nih, Jenn?”

I will definitely give her a poker face and sarcastic reply. Such as, “Seriously? Do I even need to laugh at that?”

And that’s my 9 years of friendship. And this is 20 years of marriage!

This is only an example, whilst I saw a lot of other warm scenes in front of my eyes. I even asked my friend to just adopt me into his family………………. Not that my family is bad or such, but just the warmness overwhelmed me way too much than it should.

I used to think that life is all just about working hard, getting a nice job (that I like), and getting lots and lots and lots of money. Then everything will be fine. Relationship problems come later and it’s not even that important.

But after yesterday, it literally changed my mindset. I do want a warm and nice family in the future. To think about it, I want that warmness even more than I’ve ever wanted a stable yet nice job.

To find my significant other who will laugh at my stupid jokes. To receive ‘that look’ from a special someone. And to make a warm yet nice family together. I want them all. I know that it’s hard to find him, I know. But it’s not impossible, and I’m holding onto that.

So am I family-oriented or work-oriented? I don’t know. Maybe I’ll know in the near future, or even I will never get to figure it out.

What I know, is just family is also important. Family matters. And that you guys should also figure that out before it’s too late:)

JElim.